IF I were younger, I might be excited and enthralled by this breathless and dramatic tale of adventure, full of drama and discovery. I would be amazed at the bravery and energy of a young woman not afraid to venture out in the countryside both of this country and much further afield all by herself, protected only by a sort of wild courage and fierce determination not to be confined by the expectations and limitations still imposed on women’s behaviour and place in society today.
I might envy the journeys that she has undertaken, the experiences that she has had as she camps wild in the remotest places of the British Isles, blithely relating dangers encountered and overcome, achievements and failures in the realm of walking and exploration. I would certainly be impressed at the way in which she weaves both natural and human history into the narrative, demonstrating the keen observational skills by which she has made a living as a travel writer.
But I can no longer be classified as young, even in my most optimistic moments, and life’s experiences as a woman, a mother, and a priest highlight instead a different aspect of this richly complicated book. In the pages of what is essentially a record of the various pilgrim journeys of a young woman can be seen a lost and wounded soul, grieving not just for a mother who died too soon, but for a parenting that failed to meet her needs, with a record of relationships that are mostly abusive; a person restlessly and endlessly searching for stability and peace.
Phoebe Smith is a skilled and experienced writer, which is amply demonstrated throughout the book, nowhere more so than in the depiction of a relationship that she gradually reveals to be cruel and abusive. The unfolding of this story is broken by lyrical descriptions of natural and built environments, as she ceaselessly walks the pilgrim paths of this island, seeking to restore her sense of self. Although rewarding in themselves, their dramatic placement serves only to increase the reader’s suspense as the narrative reaches its inevitable conclusion.
Memoir, travel diary, and historical and ecological companion, this book will grab and hold its readers’ attention as they follow the complicated path of a spiritual seeker. The epilogue kindly leaves us in a place of comparative peace: two new relationships with partner and son leading us to hope that, through healthy and loving encounters, this young woman might find a new path, free from the demons of her past.
The Revd Dr Sally Welch is Diocesan Canon of Christ Church, Oxford.
Wayfarer: On trauma, healing and finding your path
Phoebe Smith
Harper Collins £16.99
(978-0-00-856652-4)
Church Times Bookshop £15.29