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Have a go at the Church Times caption competition, and read the latest winner and top entries

22 December 2023


Have a go at our next caption competition (above)Send entries by email only to captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk by 9 a.m., Tuesday 2 January

Here is the winning entry for the previous competition:

Lambeth PalaceLambeth Palace

When there was far too much Christmas pudding left after Synod’s festive meal, there was only one place it could be taken (Philip Lickley)

PLANTING is part of the C of E’s Vision and Strategy, of course: “A change of ‘planting’ for Archbishop Welby — not a church but a sapling” (Lesley Cope); “Faulty message from Diocesan Missioner leads to birch planting” (Michael Doe); “Another church-plant?” (Chris Coupe); A misunderstanding of the concept of church-planting” (Wendy Walker); Before services, birch-planting is important” (Richard Fagan).

Plenty of space in Lambeth Palace gardens to bury unwanted, or precious, items: “It was agreed that some sermons should never be heard again” (John Appleby); Burial of the church silver, to keep in a safe place” (Claire Driver); “The previous Archbishop said he’d buried the spare keys in the garden, but where?!” (Sue Chick);I still say we should have cremated the Christmas logs” (Rob Falconer); “At last! Nobody will ever know what we did with our old hymn books now that The Revised English Hymnal has finally been published!” (Christopher Miller).

Some other entries for your festive amusement; “Here’s hoping the hatchet stays buried this time!” (Matthew Vernon); “So, only another 32,499 to plant and our church has offset all its carbon for 2023” (Bob Wheeler); “It should be ready for the next Lambeth Conference” (Patrick Irwin); “You left your wellies over here, Your Grace” (David Nash); “These cutbacks are getting ridiculous. This is supposed to be our Christmas tree” (Andrew Berry); “Justin was determined to get ahead of the game with his Easter garden entry” (Vicky Deasley); “It’s our cheapest option of getting to Australia” (Ken Wilkinson); “The staff at Chequers were under orders to search everywhere for the PM’s missing WhatsApp messages” (Ray Morris).

She loved the story of Zacchaeus and his sycamore” (Brian Stevenson); “Rumours were current that this greenhouse had been installed by Archbishop Laud, but historians were sceptical about this” (Richard Hough); “Despite its being a new library, the Archbishop wondered whether it was wise for him to be planting a tree of knowledge” (Michael Foster); “Hard getting in tree? More than one required!” (5) (Don Manley); They were so engrossed that no one noticed the beanstalk had grown 40 feet” (Martin Kettle).

As ever, the winner receives a prize of Fair­trade chocolate, courtesy of Divine Chocolate.


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