*** DEBUG END ***

Have a go at the Church Times caption competition, and read the latest winner and top entries

26 November 2021

Have a go at our next caption competition (right) and win a prize of Fairtrade chocolate! 

Send entries by email only to captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk by 9 a.m., Monday 6 December.











Here is the winning entry for last week:  


The PM is amused to see someone actually abiding by a protocol (John Saxbee)


HAVING attended some of the COP26 climate summit, the Prime Minister had become accustomed to having to wait in suspense for a final outcome:

  • This game of rock, paper, scissors is now in its fifth round (Roger Stanley)
  • The congregation were getting restless! Just how long would this game of rock, paper, scissors go on for! (Kristyn Harris)
  • Wouldn’t it be great if I could solve all my disagreements with a game of rock, paper, scissors, thought Boris (Nick Baker)
  • Rock, paper, scissors was taking longer than expected (Rena Plumridge)


Or perhaps another entertainment was being put on, the PM thought:

  • Is this how you do ‘Hands, knees, and bumps-a-daisy’? (David Baker)
  • One potato, two potato, three potato, four. . . (Pearl Davison)
  • Elbows, shoulders, knees, and toes . . . knees and toes. . . (Peter Sebbage)
  • Head, shoulders, knees, and woes, knees and foes (Chris Andrews)
  • You put your right arm in, your right arm out. . . (Patricia Walpole)
  • Yeesss! I know this TikTok dance. Hurry up! My turn, my turn! (Maureen Forbes)
  • Boris Johnson forgot his wallet again. Whoever puts their arm down first will need to pick up his lunch tab. Go! (Ezzie Kelham).


Having advocated at the start of the pandemic for the good old handshake, Mr Johnson appears to have changed his stance:

  • Boris was rather pleased with himself: he had invented the elbow bump, and thought it was rather cool (Jennifer Toal)
  • Boris thought COP26 had gone so well, everyone was elbow-bumping their congratulations (Kim Willing)
  • Ha! I thought of this arm-bumping thingy, now everyone is doing it (Sonia Williams).


In politics, elbows are usually used for more sinister ends:

  • At last! I can give a few people the elbow (Valerie Budd)
  • Hmmm, which Minister shall I elbow aside next? (Alison Woods)
  • Watching on, Boris knew that a fair few wanted to give him the elbow (Mark Parry)
  • Boris looks on, and, for once, is not given the elbow (Malcolm Butterworth).


Several readers noticed something even more ominous in the picture:

  • The rock, paper, scissors sideshow proved so riveting that no one noticed the sinister interloper about to invade their gathering (Jonathan Haigh)
  • Uninvited alien behind wall bewildered by human greeting (David Hanford)
  • Yeah, but it doesn’t mean much, PM, when there’s a massive alien behind you who’s about to exterminate us (Martin Kettle)
  • Boris had a secret weapon up his sleeve to get the climate-change initiatives passed — Darth Vader was waiting over the wall! (Sue Chick).


Some other entries that we enjoyed:

  • Boris was pleased to notice that, if they had to arm-wrestle for an agreement, Ireland’s Foreign Minister would lose (Avril Forest)
  • Boris had never been keen on sharing the peace (Michael Doe)
  • I am happy to report that we have all joined in blue-sky thinking — regarding our ties, at least (Julian Ashton)
  • Boris suddenly realised that he had left his face mask in his pew (Patrick Irwin)
  • Boris was being extra vigilant in checking that Covid handshakes were being performed correctly (Michael Foster)
  • Spotting the local bishop, Boris got ready to complain about his copy of the Bible, which had only one Job (Philip Lickley)
  • Uh-oh, another second job being brokered, thought Boris (Vicky Deasley)
  • I was right in saying this could be a bumpy conference (Richard Hough)
  • Hang on a minute — I don’t think we are at the right place for your Women in Politics meeting, Prime Minister (Don Manley)
  • The Prime Minister was surprised that delegates should come to blows before the conference had even started (Mervyn Cox)
  • Boris wondered who might have put the superglue on to their jackets (Chris Coupe)
  • Trouble is, if it all goes pear-shaped, they’ll say they were only speaking off the cuff (Ray Morris).
  • It was an Irish photocall, not a protocol (Brian Stevenson)
  • Don’t look now, but Big Brother is watching you (Richard Strudwick)
  • The Prime Minister hoped he would not be expected to intervene if fisticuffs ensued (Jenny Veasey)
  • Right, it says here that you are to press arms together until the glue sets (Ron Iveson)
  • Yes, I use the same tailors as Boris; he’s not keen on the new green-sleeves style either (Darrell Binding)
  • Mine is Chanel No.5 — what’s yours? (Keith Glover)
  • Now that’s what I call working together — I wish all my Cabinet members could be like that! (Lynda Sebbage)
  • To their mutual embarrassment, they discovered that they were wearing identical cufflinks (Stephen Disley)
  • Nothing to do with the COP negotiations, Prime Minister. They’re training for the new Synod — gloves off, seconds out, round one! (Charles Taylor)
  • Look at them taking it seriously, making peace — am I in the wrong place? (Robert Shooter).


As ever, the winner receives a prize of Fair­trade chocolate, courtesy of Divine Chocolate. divinechocolate.com

Browse Church and Charity jobs on the Church Times jobsite


Thu 20 Apr @ 16:08
The Archbishop of Canterbury has received the specially commissioned King James Bible that will be presented to Kin… https://t.co/u8LMnSFcfV

Welcome to the Church Times


To explore the Church Times website fully, please sign in or subscribe.

Non-subscribers can read four articles for free each month. (You will need to register.)