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Have a go at the Church Times caption competition, and read the latest winner and top entries

20 August 2021


Have a go at our next caption competition (above) and win a prize of Fairtrade chocolate! 

Send entries by email only to captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk by 9 a.m., Monday 30 August

Here is the winning entry for last week: 

The Mary Rose TrustThe Mary Rose Trust

The Vision and Strategy initiative had recruited an unlikely candidate for a lay-led church
(Michael Foster)

CATHEDRAL deans are known for their extraordinary powers, but we were not aware that time travel was among them:

  • Henry hoped that the time travellers could somehow help with his matrimonial difficulties (Stephen Disley)
  • Time travellers finally track down the first Burger King (Michael Wilton)
  • We recommend time travel during a pandemic (Janet Stockton)
  • The Microsoft time machine had a few teething troubles (Nigel Greaves).


Opinion is divided on Henry’s costume:

  • I think Henry should sack his dresser (Brian Davies)
  • And there’s me thinking the dog collar was a strange costume (Jennifer Toal)
  • One of them was clearly overdressed for the photo shoot (Chris Coupe)
  • ‘Come as you are’ can have some strange results (Valerie Budd)
  • Susan was wondering where Henry got his shoes — she rather liked the red version (Sue Patel).


Quite how this photo-shoot arose is anyone’s guess:

  • This is not what Henry had in mind when he called for a ‘cantata da camera’ (Bill de Quick)
  • Honest, Dad, all I said was ‘Alexa, help me to find someone to help with my essay on the Reformation’ (Ray Morris)
  • Who will rid me of this troublesome priest who has got himself into our photo-shoot? (Sue Chick).


A new challenge for the C of E’s weddings project?

  • By now, Your Majesty must be quite familiar with wedding photographs (Patrick Irwin)
  • Vicar, what do you mean? Why won’t there be a lovely register to sign when I marry wife number seven? (Nick Baker)
  • Another woman, plus priest: wife of much-married monarch fears the worst (John Saxbee)
  • The actor playing the King felt at a disadvantage as he only had one wife (Richard Hough)
  • I see Thomas got his way about married clergy then. Oh, well. I assume this means you’ve resolved all the rows about vestments, liturgy, and parish finances then? You’ve had nearly 500 years to do it, after all. . . (Che Seabourne).


Some other entries that we enjoyed:

  • Fr Stephen was delighted that Henry and Catherine Parr would be joining the parish group on Living in Love and Faith, as they were expert on relationships (Brian Stevenson)
  • Following the sudden departure of Cardinal Wolsey, the King was delighted to announce the appointment of his new Living in Love and Faith team (Peter Shears)
  • Boris Tudor demonstrates what ‘restoring sovereignty’ really means (Ian Barge)
  • I need some elbow room and I’m going bowlin’! (Helga Brandt)
  • I’ve got my secret stash of chocolate! (Zoe Richards)
  • At last, the General Synod shows some inclusiveness (Fiona Drinkell)
  • Yes, but I’m taller than you, even with the hat (Martin Kettle)
  • Welcome to Family Fortunes, and our first family tonight are the Tudors from London (Peter Walker)
  • Sorry, Henry, this is the queue for the cruise. Your ticket expired a few centuries ago (Madeleine Charlton)
  • Hal had something of a reputation for being a wide boy (Catherine Thorp)
  • Henry much enjoyed the opening of the new museum — in particular its execution (Philip Lickley)
  • The Covid weight gain has spiralled out of control — but the King has opened up his own Weight Watchers (Abby May)
  • Hymns (and hers) Ancient and Modern (Daphne Foster)
  • Don’t blame me — he started it (Derek Wellman)
  • Henry’s green sleeves turned brown in the autumn (John Appleby)
  • Introducing the cast of Carry On Church of England (Dawn Rowley-White)
  • Identity parade for recent beheadings proves inconclusive as eye witness is also missing her head (Alison Webb)
  • This morning’s identity parade at the police station took an unusual twist (William Clocksin).


As ever, the winner receives a prize of Fair­trade chocolate, courtesy of Divine Chocolate.


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