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Have a go at the Church Times caption competition, and read the previous winner and top entries

29 June 2018

Christ Church, Oxford

Have a go at our next caption competition: the Dean of Christ Church, Oxford, in the stocks

Have a go at our next caption competition: the Dean of Christ Church, Oxford, in the stocks

Have a go at our next caption competition (above) and win a prize of Fairtrade chocolate!

Email your entries to: captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk

or send by post (postcards only) to:

Caption Competition
Church Times
108-114 Golden Lane

London EC1Y 0TG

Entries must be received by Friday 6 July.

Here is the winner from our last caption-competition photo:

 PAOne day I might ascend to the throne, too Janet Stockton

One day, I might be able to ascend to the throne, too (Janet Stockton)


A MEMBER of the royal family in church, holding a cup of tea, looking skywards: plenty to inspire our caption writers this week.

  • Defender of fêtes? They must have misheard! (Don Manley)

  • Charles takes up new role as ‘Defender of Fêtes’ (Daniel French)

  • Yeeesss. . . Charles III, by the Grace of God, King, Defender of the Fêtes (Che R. Seabourne)

  • Hmm. . . ‘Defender of Fairtrade’ sounds appropriate, and D.G. REX F.D. still works on the coins (John Appleby).

But what is His Royal Highness looking at?

  • Is that Mama arriving by parachute again? (Angie Stupple)

  • I did ask Harry and Meghan not to climb up the scaffolding (Patrick Irwin)

  • I can see an area up there that your cleaning volunteers have completely missed (Lynda Sebbage)

  • Tell me, who arranged the fly-past, then? (Peter Sebbage)

  • Was that the rushing wind of Pentecost or William in his helicopter, Charles wondered (Sue Chick)

Some suggested that this might not have been the finest cup of tea that the Prince had ever sampled

  • Either the roof is leaking, or this is recycled Fairtrade tea (Ian Barge)

  • I say, have you a leaky roof, or did a pigeon just plop into my tea? (Tim Robinson)

  • One taste of the tea was enough; he prayed that the cup would pass from him (Edward Mynors)

  • Give us this day our daily bread . . . and a nice cup of tea (Tom Keates)

Who, exactly, was boring whom?

  • The WI were enthralled by Prince Charles’s riveting conversation about the history of the roof (Dawn Rowley-White)

  • Prince Charles had had enough of the ‘riveting’ conversation — he lifted his eyes to heaven and muttered those immortal words: ‘I’m a celebrity, get me out of here!’ (Faridah Brooker)

It seems that we are not short of republicans among our readers:

  • The kind ladies at the Heritage Centre could always be relied on to provide a welcoming cup of tea for any lost soul who happened to wander in off the street (Michael Foster)

  • Members of the Mothers’ Union (Youth Branch) were tasked with ensuring that visitors didn’t abscond with the crockery — or ask for a refill (David Sparkes)

  • All seemed impressed by the Mothers’ Union waxwork of the heir to the throne (Eric Lishman)

  • The cathedral was pleased with the prize exhibit for its new Heritage Centre (Andrew Gore)

  • The Prince was the obvious choice as the main exhibit at the Heritage Centre (Richard Hough)

They even had the temerity to mock his clothing:

  • Yes, ladies, even my overcoat is up for an English Heritage Protection Order (John Saxbee)

  • The members of the charity committee were glad that they had been able to find an old coat in the jumble that more or less fitted the homeless man (Geoffrey Robinson)

  • John Motson left me the coat (Bridget Swan)

Some other entries that we enjoyed:

  • Finished with your cup, love? (Judy Henderson Smith)

  • Is there room in your Heritage Centre for one’s mater and pater? (John Radford)

  • Little did the Prince know he was about to be invited to sign up for the Heritage Centre’s weekly lottery (Lesley Cope)

  • Your Royal Highness, I think you are going to need a bigger bucket to catch the rain coming through our roof (Heather Ford)

  • Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things (Andrew Greenhough)

  • If I ever become Supreme Governor, I shall insist that any churches I agree to visit have an efficient central heating system, and supply organic herbal tea (Mervyn Cox)

As always, the winner receives a prize of Fairtrade chocolate, courtesy of Divine: divinechocolate.com.


Wed 06 Jul @ 08:37
"The wheels of publishing turn so slowly that it was a pleasure to rediscover the stories that I had written; it’s… https://t.co/iPdQCJLJlf

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