Caption competition

by
20 January 2017

Have a go at our next picture, showing the Bishop of Leeds at the cutting edge. Entries must reach us by Friday 27 January by email to: captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk or by post (postcard only, please) to: Caption Competition, Church Times, 108-114 Golden Lane, London EC1Y 0TG

Have a go at our next picture, showing the Bishop of Leeds at the cutting edge. Entries must reach us by Friday 27 January by email to: captioncompetition@churchtimes.co.uk or by post (postcard only, please) to: Caption Competition, Church Times, 108-114 Golden Lane, London EC1Y 0TG

THE Christmas lights are presumably down by now, but our readers had a few things to say about them while there were up.

There was nothing very complimentary: “Everything was ready for the Feast of the Extravagant Consumption” (Edward Mynors); “And the darkness comprehended it not. Neither did anyone else” (Alison Rollin); “Even Dante could not have imagined this” (Richard Hough); and “Midnight mess” (Peter Walker).

More generally, we had: “For those considering a move to a Blackpool parish, a sample of what to expect was arranged” (Chris Coupe); “The new incumbent blanched as he approached his new home; the PCC had certainly prepared a welcome he would not forget” (Vicky Lundberg); “The curate had wanted to illuminate the Gentiles” (Janet Stockton); and “President Trump’s Christmas decorations were the brightest the White House had ever seen” (Patrick Irwin).

All that light could be counterproductive, of course: “Due to light pollution, the shepherds missed the stable door entirely” (Sue Chick); “It’s all very well saying just follow the star, but how are we expected to get through that lot down there?” (Daphne Foster); “Sadly, increasing light pollution meant they lost track of the star just off the Jerusalem ring road” (Shaun Clarkson); and “Don’t worry, I’m sure that we can find the Baby Jesus somewhere” (Patrick Irwin).

Carols were a source of inspiration: “Lights and lights to all he brings’’ (Peter Walker); “The everlasting light. . . Let’s hope not” (Richard Martin); “So much for twinkle, twinkle, little star” (Chris Coupe); and “All is bright. Don’t know about calm” (Bridget Swan).

More entries at random: “This is where the switched-on Bishop lives” (Janet Stockton); “. . . and the winner of the 2017 Church Times Environmental Award is not. . .” (John Radford); “I don’t think the Prime Minister meant this when she called for public recognition of Christmas” (Patrick Irwin); and “Lighten our darkness . . . and defend us from all perils and dangers of our next electricity bill” (Michael Foster).

Also: “The council suspected foul play, but Derek insisted it was sheer coincidence that his lights came on at the exact same moment as the street lights” (Andrew Greenhough); “Michael went overboard with the instruction to shine as a light in the world” (Sue Chick); and “This is all very well, darling, but now we can’t even boil a kettle” (Peter Walker).

One reader this week wins a supply of Fairtrade chocolate, kindly donated by Divine (divinechocolate.com).

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