ONE political topic dominated the last Church Times caption competition.

“It’s an in/out referendum — out of the frying pan. . .” (John Saxbee); “This might be the last chance to run the traditional Shrove Tuesday race before it gets banned by the EU” (Richard Hough); “Burnt side up, vote to stay in; soft side up, vote to leave” (John Hutchinson); and “Batter out than in” (Chris Coupe).

We are afraid that our readers did not show a great deal of respect for the institutions housed in the background. “The new method of selecting members of the House of Lords was only partially successful” (John Smith); “The hot air from the nearby building caused lift-off” (Chris Coupe); “Even the Commons accounts office felt that this was too short a distance to justify ordering a special chauffeur-driven car” (Richard Hough); and “MPs boycotted the parliamentary pancake race after they discovered that the ingredients could not be claimed on expenses” (Mervyn Cox).

There were a number of crêpe jokes, just to show how sophisticated our readership is. Or perhaps not: “All the other crêpe tossers were still in the Chamber” (Richard Barnes) “Having discovered that Church decline had crêped up on them, General Synod sent out a flipping good runner to discover why things had gone so flat” (John Radford, risking a three-match ban); and possibly: “Tired of the more common forms of political protest, one disgruntled voter attempted to act out exactly what he thought of the honourable members” (David Hill).

Not forgetting parish life: “Yet again, George found he was on two rotas simultaneously: this week it was refreshments and sacristan” (Valerie Budd); “As always, Cecil chased after those leaving early before the collection hymn” (Eric Lishman); and “The curate’s penance for saying that he didn’t give a toss for church traditions?” (Ray Morris).

Two winners — one as a special reward for sharp eyes. Both will receive some Fairtrade chocolate, courtesy of Divine (divinechocolate.com)